all the way right now not later

did the battery die again like you said last night or did you just turn your phone off like it honestly seems more logical that it was off last night and again today
am i making a fool of myself over you

you say your adopted mom knows about us but the people you live next to who you basically live with, your cousin and his family, you won’t give them a straight answer about us you say it’s cause you’re scared it’ll jinx us but all that does is make me insecure

you read the message i sent asking you to define us, it shows read days ago, but you never answered it

i’m almost scared to ask again because what if, even with how much we love each other, you don’t really want anything with me now

what if i’m making a fool of myself and you’re laughing, getting an ego boost out of it

could you really change that much?

i don’t wanna think that

i would fall apart if the only man i’ve ever loved was just playing me like that to feel good about himself

i’m willing to uproot my life, change my plans, come to where you are because i don’t want to keep you from your family that you finally have, the family that means everything to you because you didn’t get that growing up
you have your parents, your adopted parents, family that matters to you close by

i’m willing to completely change my life so we actually have a real chance maybe my willingness to do all this is for nothing

hopefully i’m just being a stupid paranoid pathetic cow

you said your phone holds a charge really well blah blah blah all week so i tried to believe maybe yeah it died last night but if you got in late you’d plug it in
even if it didn’t hit 110 percent it would’ve mostly charged

Besides who doesn’t carry a backup charger or battery pack?
and if not you, then someone around you
apple and android, those are the two main types, somebody near you has to have something
why not borrow a charger?
why not step over to your place if it’s that close and grab yours?

you can’t blame me for being suspicious life made me this way

i probably won’t try to call you again tonight
not like you seem eager to answer anyway
we talked earlier if you can even call it that
you seemed checked out, like you’d rather be anywhere else than talking to me

if there is some girl there you’d rather be with than me then just say it!

i only want you if you are 110 percent mine

if you want me you have to be all in

not sorta

not just when it’s convenient

all in

i’m never gonna keep you from being close to your family

we talked about this earlier this week:

communication is key

we’ve had trouble before -- lying by omission is just as bad as lying or cheating or sneaking around, 
just as bad as sticking a dick in someone else

i don’t know if you’re around people right now, someone who wants to talk to you, someone who doesn’t like me

i have a feeling that might be the case

and if we are a couple then you need to make that clear to them and let them get used to it
otherwise they’re a problem now and they will be a problem later

when we talk again, tonight or tomorrow if that’s what it takes, i’m going to ask you point blank to define us because i need us defined

i can’t do this when you get here we will know, no.
i need to know you’re faithful to me NOW
i need to know you’re claiming us NOW

you don’t have to shout it from a mountain to the whole world
but i need to know you are mine and mine alone
that if some girl hits on you, you shut it down
if someone tries to set you up, you shut it down

mine in words
mine in actions
not halfway
not maybe
all the way